Finding Better Ways to Seek Guidance Without Saying "Can I Pick Your Brain"

“Can I Pick Your Brain?”—There is a better way to ask for guidance!

As a notary mentor and coach, I love helping others grow in their business. I’ve dedicated years to refining my skills, building my reputation, and creating educational tools for notaries like you. So when someone reaches out to ask for help, it’s an opportunity for connection—and I genuinely enjoy it. But there's a right way and a better way to approach someone when you're seeking guidance.

Let’s talk about the phrase:
“Can I pick your brain?”

You may not realize it, but this innocent question can carry some unintended weight. When someone says, “Can I pick your brain?”—especially with no context, no introduction, and no clear purpose—it can come across as if my decades of experience are being traded for a quick phone call or a cup of coffee. And I know I’m not alone. Many professionals in this industry feel the same way.

The truth is:
My brain is full of value—and yours should be too.
We’ve spent time, money, and energy investing in ourselves. We’ve taken classes, made mistakes, and learned lessons the hard way so we could help others get ahead a little faster and with more confidence. That’s what training and coaching is for.

So how can you ask for help without stepping on toes? Here are a few respectful alternatives that show appreciation and professionalism:

1. Start With a Proper Introduction

If we haven’t met, let me know how you found me. Did you take a class? Hear me speak? See a post? It matters. A short, “Hi, my name is ___ and I attended your webinar on Trust Notarizations last fall…” goes a long way.

2. Be Clear About What You’re Asking

Instead of saying, “Can I pick your brain?” try:
“I’m struggling with XYZ, and I noticed you specialize in this area. Do you offer one-on-one coaching or short consults?”
This shows you value the other person’s time and expertise—and that you’re not just looking for free advice.

3. Offer to Invest in Their Time

If you're reaching out to someone for their knowledge, ask if they offer paid consults or training. Many seasoned notaries do! Just like you'd expect to be paid for your own notary services, they deserve the same respect for their intellectual labor.

4. Be Mindful of Timing and Method

Calling or texting someone you don’t know personally without context can feel abrupt or intrusive. A brief, polite email or direct message with your question and background is more professional—and more likely to get a positive response.

5. Appreciate the Boundaries

If someone points you to a class, a paid resource, or a scheduled call instead of answering your question on the spot, that’s not a brush-off—it’s actually a gift. They're guiding you to the structure and support you need, and that’s a sign of a true professional.

We’re all in this industry together, and part of that means lifting each other up the right way—with respect, clarity, and care.

If you’re serious about growing your notary business, be serious about how you seek guidance.
Your professionalism starts with how you show up—even before you notarize a single document.  To all of you who follow or work with me directly, I have free consult calls you can book directly with my calendar, and offer free group coaching every Sat morning 8am PST.